Tattoos, just not the ones I want...

Before I actually begin radiation, I have to go through imaging.  When I arrive, I once again hear about what I should expect while in radiation. The technicians go through what I should expect each time I come to radiation and make sure I understand the whole procedure. I get myself changed into a gown and get called into one of the radiation imaging rooms. The technicians are so nice (all three of them). They made me feel really relaxed and calm.  I have to get up on a table and the technicians begin the measuring. They nudge me this way and that. I need to be perfectly centred on the board. They have me lay my head and upper torso down on something the size and shape of a king-size pillow case. The pillow case is filled with what feels like the stuffing of a very deflated beanbag chair. A tiny bit of air is pumped into the pillow case and the technicians begin to mold it around my head and upper body. More air is inflated and more sculpting happens. The process continues until they have my arm up and open as much as they can so that no part of my body will interfere with the area that needs radiation. I need to be comfortable enough to lay in this position for twenty minutes or so without moving even a couple of millimetres. We had to try a few different ways and angles to get my arm and body comfortable enough to actually be able to stay in one position. I have been doing physiotherapy to gain full range of motion in my right arm and shoulder but have not quite reached that goal yet. Eventually we mutually agreed on a comfortable position for my arm and their satisfaction. That's when they filled the 'pillow case' with air and all of a sudden it hardened into my own body mold. So cool!! At that point the machine took me into a mini-tunnel and I had to stay perfectly still while images of my chest were taken from every possible angle. When I came out of the min-tunnel, one of the technicians called out a bunch of measurements to the exact millimetre to another technician. Each time I come for a radiation session, I will be placed back into my mold in the exact same spot. My 'pillow' mold will be stored in its own locker with my name on it. It was then that the third technician told me he needed to give me my tattoos. Four of them. Real tattoos that will be with me forever. They aren't the tattoos that I want (another bucket list item) but at least I will sort of know what to expect when I do get my 'real' tattoo. In reality, the tattoos they gave me were four little freckles. The radiation machine revolves around me, never touching me and stays within these freckles. They are in a diamond shape covering my breast and lymph node area, about 9" across and 6-7" high. Good to know, the tattoos didn't really hurt. They felt like little bites. I'm not sure if this was a great comparison to a real tattoo (not that these aren't), but I am getting ready for my fifth tattoo - one that people can see and understand. It will read, fighter.  Just like me. It will be my constant reminder that I am a fighter...