Moving along...

Ten of my twenty-five radiation treatments are in the books. So far, I haven't experienced any real side-effects.  My skin might be slightly darker but not by much. I haven't really felt any more tired than usual and my skin has not become dry or itchy. My latest appointment with my radiology oncologist went well and he is happy with the progress and the way my skin is reacting. When I met with him way back in December, he told me that radiation is a walk in the park in comparison to chemotherapy and a mastectomy. So far it has been and I hope it stays that way but I also realize how many treatments I still have to go through and how drastically things can change. Still, I am cautiously optimistic...

Getting further into radiation...

I have made it through seven treatments now and so far I haven't felt much in the way of extreme side-effects however, I have noticed that my skin has started to colour just a little bit. I have maintained my energy and have stayed as active as I was prior to radiation. I met with my radiology oncologist and he was happy that very thing was going smoothly. There really wasn't much to this appointment however he did say that at future appointments he will begin to monitor my skin and progress more closely. For the most part, the technicians and my doctor have said that I may begin to notice signs of fatigue after about my tenth treatment. They are very happy that I am trying to actively walk at last five kilometres a day as they have said that there are studies which have proven that exercise and remaining active help treating cancer patients. My plan is to listen to my body but stay as active as possible. I meet with my doctor again later this week...

Radiation...

I have now had five radiation treatments. It's really cool and super easy (at this point).  Each time I need to get changed from the waist up and put on a gown. I can keep my pants on and all my jewelry except for my necklaces. My first treatment, I went into the room and lay down on the board. Two technicians are in the room with me and they begin to set you up immediately. I have to slide my one arm out of the gown so they can fix the machine on me in the exact same spot between the tattoos each time. They get me into the exact position, to the millimetre, The technicians put a type of material over top of my breast that had the cancer that is supposed mimic skin. The technicians then leave the room.  The machine begins to move around me, from one side, over the top of me and then to the other side. The actual radiation takes no longer then three minutes.  That's it, I'm done. Five down, twenty more to go...

Tattoos, just not the ones I want...

Before I actually begin radiation, I have to go through imaging.  When I arrive, I once again hear about what I should expect while in radiation. The technicians go through what I should expect each time I come to radiation and make sure I understand the whole procedure. I get myself changed into a gown and get called into one of the radiation imaging rooms. The technicians are so nice (all three of them). They made me feel really relaxed and calm.  I have to get up on a table and the technicians begin the measuring. They nudge me this way and that. I need to be perfectly centred on the board. They have me lay my head and upper torso down on something the size and shape of a king-size pillow case. The pillow case is filled with what feels like the stuffing of a very deflated beanbag chair. A tiny bit of air is pumped into the pillow case and the technicians begin to mold it around my head and upper body. More air is inflated and more sculpting happens. The process continues until they have my arm up and open as much as they can so that no part of my body will interfere with the area that needs radiation. I need to be comfortable enough to lay in this position for twenty minutes or so without moving even a couple of millimetres. We had to try a few different ways and angles to get my arm and body comfortable enough to actually be able to stay in one position. I have been doing physiotherapy to gain full range of motion in my right arm and shoulder but have not quite reached that goal yet. Eventually we mutually agreed on a comfortable position for my arm and their satisfaction. That's when they filled the 'pillow case' with air and all of a sudden it hardened into my own body mold. So cool!! At that point the machine took me into a mini-tunnel and I had to stay perfectly still while images of my chest were taken from every possible angle. When I came out of the min-tunnel, one of the technicians called out a bunch of measurements to the exact millimetre to another technician. Each time I come for a radiation session, I will be placed back into my mold in the exact same spot. My 'pillow' mold will be stored in its own locker with my name on it. It was then that the third technician told me he needed to give me my tattoos. Four of them. Real tattoos that will be with me forever. They aren't the tattoos that I want (another bucket list item) but at least I will sort of know what to expect when I do get my 'real' tattoo. In reality, the tattoos they gave me were four little freckles. The radiation machine revolves around me, never touching me and stays within these freckles. They are in a diamond shape covering my breast and lymph node area, about 9" across and 6-7" high. Good to know, the tattoos didn't really hurt. They felt like little bites. I'm not sure if this was a great comparison to a real tattoo (not that these aren't), but I am getting ready for my fifth tattoo - one that people can see and understand. It will read, fighter.  Just like me. It will be my constant reminder that I am a fighter...

The next step...

I've met with my radiology oncologist and he's told me what to expect during radiation.  I am going to be going to radiation five days a week (Monday through Friday) for five straight weeks. Radiation is cumulative. I should expect to feel very fatigued. As well, my skin will start to feel more and more sunburned. It sort of works like this. Imagine being in the sun with no sunscreen for 30 minutes. Then another 30 minutes. And another.  Keep going like this through the day for 12.5 hours in the sun with no sunscreen. Imagine how burnt you would be. That's how this works. Each time I go for radiation I sort of get a little more 'UV rays'. Obviously they aren't UV rays but each day I add a little bit of the radiation to my skin. Eventually it hits a point where my skin is getting tanned, then dark, then a bit burnt, then really burnt. It can get very painful and the burns can become very bad. The reason I need to go for any radiation is to ensure that there are no cancer cells left near the breast bone or in any of the surrounding tissue in my lymph nodes and breast. If this is one more step in ensuring the cancer has been removed for my body then sign me up. Radiation begins this Friday...

Peach fuzz (and my wig) are sooo done! Bring on real hair...

Finally! My actual hair is growing in! I am so thrilled! My eyebrows are completely back in full force...hmmmm, that reminds me, I may need to do some plucking and trimming (it's been a while). My eyelashes have grown in as well, although they are only about half-way there - enough that I can put some mascara on again though! Oh, the small thrills in life! My hair, it's finally growing in on my head. I am so excited! I swear I can see that it has grown overnight. It is so soft, like baby hair. I don't know yet if it is going to come in curly or straight but I have a little clue to the colour. Right now it light in colour, kind of golden but I think it will eventually grown in light brown with some blond in it. The sides of my head are very light - I hope it stays that way. Having said all of this, I am just hoping it doesn't come in gray. I didn't have any gray hair before, I don't want it now! As soon as my hair is long enough to cover my scalp and not see it through my hair, it will be no more hats and wigs for me. I can't wait!

Do something on your bucket list...

I recently wrote about the importance of having a bucket list. Just as important as having a bucket list is actually doing things on your bucket list. One thing that I have wanted to do for a long time is take part in a cancer run/walk.  Well, this year is the year.  I am beginning to put together a team of people to walk (not run - unless you really want to) with me. I always thought that this would be the cause I would walk for being that cancer is in my family. This year it's time to put my money where my mouth is, so-to-speak, and do it! Now I just have to figure out a team name...

Let me explain...

After meeting with my oncologist and surgeon, I needed to take some time for myself. I did some reflecting and took time for myself. I knew that that couldn't go on forever though and that I needed to go back to being the fighter that I am. Dwelling on the future and what may or may not be, will not help me. I have so much of my own positive energy (and so much from so many other wonderful people) and like I said, I am a fighter. Boy, am I. I know that I have and will,  fight through many obstacles and this is only one more obstacle in my life's path. I told my son way back in the beginning that I will be sticking around to be with him and my family, and I will. I will survive, beat, and conquer this obstacle. I just needed a little time to get that fighting spirit back.  It's back baby, it's back...